tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post22508801562256782..comments2024-03-01T00:28:27.209-05:00Comments on Hello Ello: Selfish ParentsEllo - Ellen Ohhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18311917335471167591noreply@blogger.comBlogger38125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-42893485886292506622008-06-04T11:39:00.000-04:002008-06-04T11:39:00.000-04:00Yeah, I'd be pissed off too. Good luck talking to...Yeah, I'd be pissed off too. Good luck talking to the parents - I hope they're receptive.<br><br>And if they're not, you know where they live. Go puncture their tires.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-77638208147086001382008-06-04T12:28:00.000-04:002008-06-04T12:28:00.000-04:00I'll bet the parents who were there early all figu...I'll bet the parents who were there early all figured one of the other adults would stay and wait. <br><br>Perhaps it's time for the school to send out reminders about the school bus policy. <br><br>I can't bring myself to consider what might have happened to any of those kids, especially the little ones, if you hadn't arrived. Grr.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-80199022784111749712008-06-04T12:40:00.000-04:002008-06-04T12:40:00.000-04:00In our society today, this is how children get abd...In our society today, this is how children get abducted or killed. Seriously.<br><br>It ticks me off when I see kids unattended at our park. I won't leave if it's just us and one little kid (under the age of five or six) just wandering, waiting for his lazy ass dad to pick him up. <br><br>Pisses me off, too. Now I'm on the rant! Grrrroooowwwlll!<br><br>AngeliqueAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-51433865804710337852008-06-04T12:41:00.000-04:002008-06-04T12:41:00.000-04:00i am a mommy of your ilk. these kiddos needed an ...i am a mommy of your ilk. these kiddos needed an adult. period.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-46528249356077050752008-06-04T13:20:00.000-04:002008-06-04T13:20:00.000-04:00It's a shame we have to worry about kids this way,...It's a shame we have to worry about kids this way, but we truly do. A shame ALL adults don't have concern for children, but many of them are actually predators on kids. Sickening.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-75044020274096679402008-06-04T14:10:00.000-04:002008-06-04T14:10:00.000-04:00nice to know their are people you can count on eh?...nice to know their are people you can count on eh?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-66136405723096153532008-06-04T14:13:00.000-04:002008-06-04T14:13:00.000-04:00What else can I add? It's this self-absorbed soci...What else can I add? It's this self-absorbed society. Always thinking someone else should pick up the slack. Always thinking someone else is to blame? I can just hear it now: "Well it's not MY fault if people don't show up on time to pick up their kids..." <br>Do these people even stop for a nanosecond to consider the reality of the consequences to their indifference?<br><br>Obviously no. 'Cause I refuse to believe that any parent of a child would truly be that callous if they were in touch with reality.<br><br>Go get 'em, Ello. Kick some ass.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-59475465811694441232008-06-04T14:40:00.000-04:002008-06-04T14:40:00.000-04:00It's good to see that my reaction wasn't over the ...It's good to see that my reaction wasn't over the top! I am still mad and Precie - you are right, I will definitely be talking to the school administration about this. In fact, I think they should send a notice home to all parents about this. <br><br>Everyone - thanks for listening to me rant! Grrr, I am still mad!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-41812899822180375632008-06-04T15:02:00.000-04:002008-06-04T15:02:00.000-04:00I'm one of those Moms who scans the street, when s...I'm one of those Moms who scans the street, when she sees a kid walking on its own ,to see where the adult is who's <i>supposed</i> to be in charge. Invariably the adult in question is 15 yards ahead with a cell phone to his/her ear oblivious to the fact that their toddler is miles behind. The number of parents that walk along the street leaving a very young child to walk on the edge of the pavement and not holding their hand astonishes me. I once was walking away from the schoolgate when, ahead of me, a two-year-old, on her little tricycle and on her own wandered out onto the road as a car came around the corner. Luckily the driver was going very slowly and my frantic waving and yelling slowed it to a stop while I coaxed the little girl in. Her Dad then appeared on the scene, scratching his head saying "Well she's never done <i>that</i> before." To which I threw my hands in the air and said "X (I'll protect the identity of the moron) she's TWO! YOU CAN"T TRUST A TWO-YEAR -OLD WITH TRAFFIC!! <i>EVER</i>. Honestly you can't trust any primary school age kid with traffic because sometimes they forget - or they're daydreaming - or their bloody ball rolls out. Kids need to be watched near traffic. Always!"<br><br>I still feel that our kids are in far more danger from traffic than from predatory paedophiles. I say that as a parent, as a pedestrian and as a driver. In this case the fault was with the bus driver. S/he had a duty of care to those kids to ensure that they were supervised. Even if there were adults present s/he should've made sure that the children would be watched. Personally I don't think the kids should be allowed off the bus till their next carer is present. But I totally agree that the parents who left those kids alone were irresponsible in the extreme! I have waited with a kid for 45 minutes in freezing temperatures when her Dad was delayed. He was grateful but added that there was really no need as she knew he might be late. Surely the point is that he should've made alternative arrangements if he knew being delayed was a possibility. Surely every parent should see it as their responsibility never to leave a kid unattended and therefore vulnerable.<br><br>I must drink a calming cuppa tea now.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-31285659872819565702008-06-04T15:24:00.000-04:002008-06-04T15:24:00.000-04:00Whatever happened to the village? You know, the on...Whatever happened to the village? You know, the one that is required to raise a child...<br><br>I'm glad you were there!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-18578796849081101732008-06-04T15:35:00.000-04:002008-06-04T15:35:00.000-04:00All those other parents who left figure that someo...All those other parents who left figure that someone like you will be along any minute. Hey, they were right. :-)<br><br>Seriously, some obligations can't be missed for some other lazy parent. I can imagine having to pick my kid up in time for an important meeting. If there's another kid unattended, do I miss my meeting because of the other parent? Maybe the other guy is lazy, or stuck in traffic, or dead of a heart attack. I don't know. But if I'm not on that meeting, my own reputation, job, perhaps even career may suffer. Selfish? It's all relative.<br><br>Is the parent who arrives on time and leaves with her kid any more selfish than the parent who shows up late? I tend to be very wary of painting someone's entire character with the brush of a single event.<br><br>That said, a large number of parents <i>are</i> selfish. I volunteer as crossing guard twice a week at our school, and I can't believe the kind of selfish behavior parents exhibit. Block traffic in a no-stopping zone to pick up your kid illegally. Make an illegal U-turn in the middle of the block. Drive 40 mph through the school zone during drop-off or pick-up. It's remarkable how otherwise intelligent, educated parents decide they can make up their own rules if the real rules don't fit their schedules.<br><br>As a coach and scout leader, I personally tend never to leave a child alone if I can help it. Sometimes, though, I just can't help it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-81853572420546782562008-06-04T15:52:00.000-04:002008-06-04T15:52:00.000-04:00Yes, that's terrible, Ello. I would have waited to...Yes, that's terrible, Ello. I would have waited too. I have and I don't even have children yet. I love kids and think it's so terrible that they are constantly taken for granted.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-86445422653871112292008-06-04T16:56:00.000-04:002008-06-04T16:56:00.000-04:00Interesting topic. We're just starting kindergarte...Interesting topic. We're just starting kindergarten this year, so it's the first I might have to deal with it. I could only think, however, that I don't remember ever having an adult waiting at the bus stop with me when I was a kid. And I don't remember parents as we drove through town at the other stops either. Has this changed, or is it an age thing, because I didn't start riding the bus until I was 9 or so.<br><br>But, yeah, I'd never let my 5 year old hang out at the stop by himself.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-27201762225188571172008-06-04T16:57:00.000-04:002008-06-04T16:57:00.000-04:00I'm with Travis!I'm with Travis!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-49910012915588589842008-06-04T17:29:00.000-04:002008-06-04T17:29:00.000-04:00pacatrue's comments reminded me of my childhood. ...pacatrue's comments reminded me of my childhood. I remember in third grade walking to and from school sometimes when the weather was nice or if I'd missed the bus. It was about a mile, and I mostly walked it alone.<br><br>My kids walk home from school alone now (or together), but it's only about 100 yards, and we can see them out our window for 80 of those 100 yards.<br><br>My kids look at me like I've sprouted roses from my eyeballs when I tell them that I never rode in a car seat or booster. When I was a baby, my mom put me in a laundry basket on the back seat.<br><br>Times have really changed.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-79223376042336302922008-06-04T17:52:00.000-04:002008-06-04T17:52:00.000-04:00If you compare the traffic now with what it was ba...If you compare the traffic now with what it was back in the fifties, sixties or even seventies, it is a whole new world. I would never have left those kids unattended at the bus stop.<br><br>We were notorious for being over-protective in Japan. Why? Because we insisted on always having an adult present in the house up until our eldest was almost ten. We never left them alone, even at home. Japanese parents think this is overly protective. As for kids being out on their own, in some schools there is actually a policy that kids HAVE to walk to school on their own. Parents are prohibited from accompanying their kids to or from school -- I kid you not. Before our eldest started school, we'd heard about this policy. We went down to the school to let them know we planned to ignore it, and the principal told us he agreed that it ought to be up to the parents. But every day we saw six-year-olds walking on their own down crowded, narrow streets with no sidewalks and furious traffic. We also found out that a six-year-old boy had killed on that road, struck by a car. And an exhibitionist worked the road too -- our eldest and a friend ended up meeting him one day. <br><br>Dozens of times I walked my daughter's little friend home in the evening after her grandfather refused to come pick her up because he was watching television. Talk about selfish.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-71168724892732831122008-06-04T18:28:00.000-04:002008-06-04T18:28:00.000-04:00a painting classmate says that parents at her scho...a painting classmate says that parents at her school lets kindy kids walk home! or they will drop them off like at 7am before the school is officially open and let them wander around the school ground by themselves. the school had to send a letter out to the parents.<br><br>just thinking about it gives me a heartattack. of course, my mom was pretty protective--but i think you need to strike a balance. little kids are too young to leave at a bus stop!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-83984298292876237302008-06-04T20:25:00.000-04:002008-06-04T20:25:00.000-04:00Ok I have to respond to PJD because he makes reall...Ok I have to respond to PJD because he makes really good points but I still don't agree. <br><br>I actually have chanced being late. Since I teach it is imperative that I make it to class on a timely basis. It is unacceptable for me to be late. The students pay for my time and I have a responsibility to be timely. But one day a little boy came off the bus. He was supposed to take my bus on Wednesdays and another parent was to take him with her child to an after school activity. But she wasn't there and neither was her child. This 6 year old was all alone and didn't know what to do. I had to drive him all the way back to school and nearly was late to my class. But it was a risk I was willing to take. I was the last parent, as usual and therefore the only one left to see his dilemma. But this is why I always wait. To me it doesn't matter how busy you are, you've got to take a moment to care. This is very important to me.<br><br>And yes the bus driver is at fault also. We had a tornado and bad thunderstorm right at dismissal so I haven't been able to talk to anyone today, but I will be talking to the school about the bus driver and the parents tomorrow.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-19806283746615744522008-06-04T21:23:00.000-04:002008-06-04T21:23:00.000-04:00You have a right to be angry, Ello, but you're als...You have a right to be angry, Ello, but you're also one terrific and responsible adult.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-49893962716537000462008-06-04T21:57:00.000-04:002008-06-04T21:57:00.000-04:00A prickly situation, Ello, and one that I have hon...A prickly situation, Ello, and one that I have honestly never considered, as my daughter is still in pre-school and doesn't take the bus. <br><br>But there does need to be some kind of protocol here. And your outrage is well placed in addressing it. Good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-16655468474664326592008-06-04T23:04:00.000-04:002008-06-04T23:04:00.000-04:00Those kids are too small to be alone at a bus stop...Those kids are too small to be alone at a bus stop in this metro area. <br><br>That, and times have changed. A lot. I walked home and got on and off busses at a very young age - with my group of neighbor kids, and no parents in sight -but it was a different time, in a neighborhood where at each house - there was someone who knew you- and everyone watched out for one another. And people were oustide - not insulated from sight and sound inside their houses.<br><br>I'd be pissed off too, El. I really would.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-40614588117465078392008-06-05T07:13:00.000-04:002008-06-05T07:13:00.000-04:00Yes, people can be incredibly selfish. It's scary....Yes, people can be incredibly selfish. It's scary. I suppose each of them assumed that somebody else would stay behind with the kids.<br>But were you able to discipline a bit or, at least, watch those kids who were running in the parking lot?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-16556857492042427982008-06-05T08:00:00.000-04:002008-06-05T08:00:00.000-04:00Ello:I agree. I see selfish stuff all around me, a...Ello:<br>I agree. I see selfish stuff all around me, all the time. As a volunteer (ESL, unwed teen moms, Christmas Mother, etc.), I get to see people who do so much unsung good in the world. And get to see the worst of how people can be callous.<br><br>I do have to agree a little bit with pjd in that . . . the "last man standing" was the one most responsible, in a sense. I.e., if there were three parents or four parents, and one by one they left, they left knowing other parents were still there, and assuming parents were on the way. It was the last person who left and left knowing no parents had arrived yet who really has to answer for the situation.<br><br>Which points to our hurried society. I.e., we don't TALK to each other!!! My guess is, had parents spoken to each other, "Hi . . . can you wait until other parents get here? I have a meeting, but I'm uncomfortable with this because the driver came early, and what if I leave and kids are unattended?" that sort of thing. But people don't talk to each other.<br><br>EAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-6620252882983798712008-06-05T10:08:00.000-04:002008-06-05T10:08:00.000-04:00That kind of attention and patience are in short s...That kind of attention and patience are in short supply today.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4595491177347226789.post-8205747374822246952008-06-05T10:39:00.000-04:002008-06-05T10:39:00.000-04:00Ello, your example of the six year old being all a...Ello, your example of the six year old being all alone if you left is probably one of those situations where I would also stay or at least try to make some calls on behalf of the kid. But that's not the situation you described originally, where there were a number of children still at the bus stop. Traffic is no doubt a concern, but as I've observed in five years as a crossing guard, children run into the street whether supervised or unsupervised. Sometimes parents actually <i>encourage</i> the children to run across the street in the middle of the block because they don't want to wait for the kid to walk a hundred feet to the crosswalk. Anyway, the situation I was referring to involved several kids there together, which I think is very different from the last kid being left alone.<br><br>In a situation where there is one remaining six year old, I am sure I would stay. That's why I carry a cell phone, and I could easily make an excuse for being late for my next obligation. I have done this for cub scouts and soccer games even when the kid is not my responsibility (though usually at these times I'm not on a tight schedule).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com