What a beautiful country! What a pain in the ass to fly to! I was flying to Barbados for my best friend's wedding and my daughter was the flower girl. My day started at 3AM to get to the airport, Dulles International, by 4Am for my 6:30 flight. After standing on a line 5,000 people long, my daughter and I barely made it to our gate on time. It is absolutely crazy how bad getting through security is at DC airports. I don't blame them, I'm glad for all the security. But it is difficult to stand through. Switching in Miami, we sat on the floor of the crowded waiting area for over three hours before finally boarding. I always give my daughter the window seat. She can look out and she doesn't have to sit next to a stranger. A tall broadshouldered well dressed man sat next to me as I was in the monkey seat. After exchanging polite smiles, I completely ignored him even as he kept pushing me off the armrest and his shoulder kept encroaching into my space. Finally, Mr. Nudgey decides to instigate conversation.
"First time in Barbados?"
"Yep."
"So what are you going down for?"
"Wedding."
"Really? Me too."
Polite smile. Pause.
He begins again.
"So where are you staying?"
"St. Peter."
"Gee that's far."
"Mmmm."
"I'm staying in Christchurch. Lot's of fun. There's nothing to do where you are. You're gonna want to come to us to go out."
"Mmmm."
"So what are you planning to do while you are down there?"
"My daughter and I will do some beach activities."
"Daughter?"
I point at my daughter curled up in her window seat playing her gameboy.
"She's with you?"
"Uh huh."
"Divorced?"
"Huh?"
"I don't see your husband..."
"Oh I came separately..."
"Separated?"
"No! He's home."
"Oh."
Long pause.
"So you okay?
"Huh?"
"Any problems with your marriage?"
"No," me annoyed. "He had to stay home with my other daughters."
Finally loses interest.
So how sleazy can you get?!!!
The Wedding was beautiful. the bride was the most beautiful woman on Barbados that day and the groom was so stylish and debonair. I'll have to blog later on aabout the return trip. But in the meantime, something funny to get you in the mood. A funny clip that is a bit old but always so funny:
Hi ello-
ReplyDeleteGlad you're back- glad you had a great time- I'm right there with you on the hassles of the airports in this area.
Story with the guy on the plane-classic!
Robin
Welcome back Ello!!
ReplyDeleteIt looks beautiful, I hope you had a great time once you were there!
That guy is a total creep. Be careful about answering too many questions!
Yerk on the jerk.
ReplyDeleteGlad you're back.
Hi!!!
ReplyDeleteEWWWWW about the guy on the plane.
Glad the wedding went well.
seriously?! what is WRONG with some people? it must be a terrible burden for you to be SO charming that you have to fight off guys like that.
ReplyDeletei'm going to USVI with Momrat over christmas. i hope it's as pretty as your picture...
Ello, if that was me sitting next to you on that plane and you were reading a novel, and I saw you skip ahead to see how it ended, you'd wish it was that creepy guy sitting beside you instead of me! :-)
ReplyDeletePeople who skip ahead are one of my many pet peeves!
I wonder if that guy's wife knows what he's up to on planes? Five bucks says he has a wife.
gettin the moves put on you on the plane..look at youuuuuuuuuuu
ReplyDeleteany problems with your amrriage??!!
ReplyDeletewhat the hell? i would have said, "no, just with my obnoxious seatmate..."
Getting checked in at the airport . . . hassle.
ReplyDeleteGetting hit on by guy with your daughter sitting next to
you . . . creepy.
Getting away to tropical island with 1 kid . . . wonderful.
Leaving your husband with other kids . . . priceless.
Josephine, I'm with you about reading/knowing the ending before reading/seeing the book/movie. Unfortunately, ello and her sibs appear to lack any patience whatsoever.
What's even more annoying is when one of her sibs sees a movie before us (which is always since we have kids) and then discusses it with ello in front of me. Even when I tell them to keep quiet, they insist on talking about it, and I always end up picking up on the ending based on their conversation . . . drives me crazy!!!
Da' Man
Glad you're back and you had a good time at the wedding. Even with the delay in departure and the "creep" you sat beside, you enjoyed yourself (and aren't you glad you gave your daughter the window so she didn't have to sit next to him!).
ReplyDeleteI've been to Barbados and it is a beautiful place.
Hi Ello, welcome home!!!
ReplyDelete"Any problems in your marriage?"!!! Okay, that has to be the sleeziest pick up line ever.
Next time someone does that to you, use this response:
"Oh, no, my husband had to work late, damn Internal Revenue Service won't give any time off at all!!!.... umn, what was you're name again?"
Thanks for stopping in at my place, Lottery was fantastic - I hope you get time to participate in the book discussion next month, it should be fun... Oh, and I'll be posting on my writing progress today or tomorrow... how about you? How's the writing going?
that guy on the plane...whoo, scary!!! Thanks God you're safe and back :) Do you have more photos?
ReplyDeleteI like this clip about subtitles, it is funny.
It makes fun of people of Iraq, but on the other hand, the American reporter is LYING!!! Just as much as the Iraqian soldier tells us so. Now THAT is the best pun in the whole video!!!
If you read my comment Ello, relate to that, please.
I want to hear your opinion.
You were missed Ello, but a getaway to a destination wedding sounds terrific...better yet IF we had our own wings! ;)
ReplyDeleteHahaha...funny video! I've never seen that before.
ReplyDeleteI've never been to Barbados or any tropical island for that matter. But I have been on planes with less than desirable seatmates! ;-)
Glad you had a safe trip!
Hey everyone! The funny thing about that story is that I was so tired I didn't realize he was hitting on me until he asked if I was separated and then a light bulb went off and I was so offended that he would do so with my kid sitting right next to me! After I stopped talking to him, he was pretty much chatting up all the attractive girls not traveling with male companions. What a scumbag.
ReplyDeleteMR - the Virgin Islands are supposed to be even prettier so you will have a blast!
JD - You read my note on Nathan's blog, huh! Well to be absolutely honest, I do my best to refrain from peeking at the end of a book. I've only ever done it a handful of times when I was afraid that a character I loved might have been killed off. but I know it's bad and I try not to do it!
Now that I'm back, I must definitely try to get some more writing done - which I haven't been doing at all because I've been so busy, and now we have holidays coming up! Sheesh, who has time anymore!
Szelsofa - glad you like the clip. I didn't even think about any double entendres in the script itself until you pointed it out. Boy how dense am I! Since this is a BBC clip - I'm sure they greatly enjoyed highlighting the "American lying" part of it!
Wow, Barbados. Sounds cool even if your flight was a pain. As for the guy who was hitting on you, what a dweeb. I would never have the gall to behave in that fashion.
ReplyDeleteYou should have told him your husband was on the plane but you couldn't sit together because they don't allow air marshals to sit with relatives on planes.
ReplyDeleteYou're a writer - make up some fantastic story. He was hitting on you. He deserved it.
Welcome back.
ello, welcome back! i love the foto! i've always consoled myself in thinking that having a bub with you prevents all sorts of being picked up on. but i guess it's just me. haha! take it as a compliment! ;*)
ReplyDeleteand please tell us about your experiences working in the morgue. wtf! *runs away screaming*
I commented on this about 14 hours ago, but my comments are being eaten all day, but I have a new anonympus posting theory....
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I loved the video. I also had not seen it before, thanks.
I also think Da Man is secretly stoked that his wife is getting hit on by guys but that she keeps choosing him over and over.
Pacatrue
Ello,
ReplyDeleteBeautiful photo!
Wow, that photo is gorgeous - did you take it? I was in Barbados on my birthday this year.
ReplyDeleteWhat a sleaze bag. Some guys are so nasty.
Ello, BTW, luv the photo!
ReplyDeleteThe creep should be glad that wasn't me he was hitting on, I'd keep dropping the "f" bomb on him all the way to Barbados!
I read worthwhile books to evaluate the entire structure, and to see if the ending was properly set-up, so no skipping for me or peeking ahead.
JMO, if a book's worth reading, it's worth reading straight through.
If a book's not worth reading, I toss it pretty early on; I don't care how it ends if the start is bad.
And don't even get me started on audio books! lol
josephine--I do believe you are my soul sister. :) I used to feel guilty giving up on books I wasn't enjoying. But life is just too short and there are too many excellent books in the world for me to waste time on ones that don't enthrall me. Audio books? I've never seen the appeal. But that's just me.
ReplyDelete