My middle name is

Dear Larramie at Seize a Daisy has tagged me for a middle name meme. Something about listing one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don't have a middle name, just make one up...or use the one you would have liked to have had.

So my middle name is like 13 letters long and I just don't have that many interesting facts about myself to make this an interesting post. Well, I was feeling weird so I decided to write up the facts and make up a middle name depending upon what I got so here goes:

O - is for OCD. During the winter my hands turn into little alligator clutches cause I wash my hands so much you can actually see the dried up diamond shape markings of my skin. And I would rather pee my pants than use a port-o-potty.

S - is for sarcastic. Try to understand that I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, I really am smarter and better looking than you.

S - is for serious. No seriously, I am smarter and better looking than you.

H - is for happy. Truly I am, especially after I punched that last moron who told me to turn my frown upside down.

E - is for eating. My new avatar is a pig. Need I say more?

L - is for laughter. Hey, if I can't laugh at you, then who will?

A - is for anal. It comes with having OCD. I don't like when people touch my stuff. They'll put it out of order. I don't like lending people my books because I hate it when they bend my spine. I don't like naked dolls. If I see a naked doll, even if it is at someone else's house, I must dress it. This is non-negotiable. While in the Barbados, I got into a little fight with my friend's 3 year old who insisted that her Barbies needed to swim naked in the pool and began screaming at me when I kept trying to sneak clothes on their naked bodies behind her back.

So OSSHELA is now my middle name. But I didn't like the sound of that so I started playing with the letters and switching them until I realized that my real middle name is actually "ASSHOLE." Ain't that a bitch?