Saturday, January 3, 2009

Breaking out the New Year with a Brand New Blog!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

So if my redirect worked, it should have brought you here, to Hello Ello 2, my new home. Welcome, welcome! I've missed you all! I've missed the blog. But I have been a good Mommy, scheduling back to back playdates (which I absolutely despise and dread), even having 3 simultaneous playdates (horror of horrors) and am just barely retaining my sanity. I don't know how other Moms schedule playdates every day during the holidays. Dealing with my own kids is difficult enough, dealing with other people's kids and your own requires certain saintly qualities that I apparently have not been blessed with.

Back to my new blog. Nothing should have changed significantly.
Aerin,
wonder woman Pictures, Images and Photos aka Wonder Woman, who has been so awesome to help me, imported everything over beautifully and if anything is screwy, it is entirely my own inept fault. Like the linky love. I can't seem to just cut and paste the list, confound you Blogger! That means I have to rebuild linky love. This goes completely against my sin of sloth. I has such a headache just thinking about it!

So I will have to rebuild my links back up slowly and I will ask you for your help. If you have linked to me or followed me in the past, may I ask you very kindly to link and/or follow my new blog? Leave me a comment and I will make sure to link you up asap. And I will need help to make sure I capture everyone so if you don't see your link on my side bar, it is not intentional, it is simply stupidity and sloth. So help a girl out, won't ya? Thank you all very kindly!

By the way, since my girls have found my blog, I've been forced by Da Man to clean up my blog. I've been searching out some of my more colorful word choices and found that there were over 250 uses of a certain foul excrement word in my previous blog posts. In fact, I found one post where I used excrement a total of 20 times. Sheesh that took forever to clean out. And additionally there were approximately 90 posts using a word that rhymes with luck. Who knew I was so foul mouthed? Apparently everyone but me.

But as we are starting the New Year and a New Blog, I decided that I will share something with all of you. My dirty little secret.
cute skunk Pictures, Images and Photos
Sometimes I am a real stinker of a Mommy.I have lots of examples of being a stinker, but here is one that still cracks me up. It earns me the glare of other Mommy disapproval if they were to know about it but I don't care.

Youngest has this little Oreo cookie ritual. She likes to open up the chocolate cookies so that the cream side is up. She will open 3 or 4 in a row and then she likes to carve out half the cream onto the naked cookie so that all her chocolate cookies now have at least an equal amout of white cream on each cookie. Only then will she eat them. (Yeah, I have OCD and each of my kids have some form of it. As OCD goes, this is pretty mild.) Well I take joy in waiting until Youngest has opened all her cookies and then I distract her by shouting out "Angus is playing with your brand new Barbie kitchen set!" or some other nonsense like that, at which point she runs off to protect her toys, leaving her cookies unguarded. I quickly eat all the cream off of her cookies and then run and hide. Oldest disapproves and tells me I am terrible. She is right.

When Youngest comes back, she throws an extraordinary temper tantrum on finding that all the cream has been eaten and all she has are sad little naked cookies. Now she no longer wants to eat them, which works for Oldest who likes only the cookie part anyway. Oldest scoops up the cookies and eats them and Youngest begins to cry.

After I have finished laughing, I dry her tears and bring out some more Oreo cookies for Youngest to eat. I've pulled this trick on Youngest in many different variations as she has gotten more and more distrustful of me. Sometimes I pretend I'm just trying to help her, other times I snatch the cream side out of her hand and stuff it in my mouth. I just love to see how indignant she gets. And yes, I am such a big stinker.

The other day, Youngest got an oreo cookie and opened it and said "Here Mommy, I got your favorite cookie for you! Open wide!" holding the cream side up in front of my mouth. I gladly opened up when suddenly she pulls a fast switcheroo and shoves the naked no cream side of the cookie into my mouth at the same time she shoves the yummy cream filled one into hers.

"Ha Ha!" she shouts gleefully.

The little stinker got me. I'm so proud. It's times like this that bring tears of joy to my eyes.

Don't forget to pop by Jason's writing contest over at The Clarity of Night. The competition is always amazing and the prizes are terrific!

29 comments:

Angie said...

I'm here! [wave] I'll get you re-subscribed into my Google list, and next time I update my sidebar I'll put number two in. :)

You are a major brat and if I were your kid I'd be plotting dire revenge, LOL! I hope you had a great New Year anyway. :D

Angie

JaneyV said...

You are a mean Mommie! But it's good to see that your own particular brand of tough love is reaping results. Ha!

I'm here too. I've changed my sidebar and will do the Blogs I Follow thingy forthwith! I will miss your potty mouth although I love that Angie called this one Number 2.

Happy New Year Ello

Smittenly Written said...

Love it. Love it. Love it. That is a fun Mommy if you ask me. :) Bonding is bonding... :)

I'm officially following you. Happy New Blog!!!

Erica Orloff said...

Evil.

I knew I liked you.

:-)
E

J. L. Krueger said...

Apparently you are a good teacher even if you are a "wicked mommy!"

Sustenance Scout said...

Sounds to me like you're raising a tough cookie with a great sense of humor, Ello. Nothing wrong about that! K.

Sustenance Scout said...

p.s. Happy New Year!

jjdebenedictis said...

The cookies are the best part. Really, you're just teaching her to appreciate them properly.

Linky-love to you. :-)

Aerin said...

Ell, everything looks great! Blogger doesn't have a way to switch the links over - I'm hoping they're working on it. Let me know if you need anything else, but I'm stealing the Wonder Woman picture. :)

Aerin said...

BTW - sorry the redirect failed; it worked when I did the trial on my test blogs. Want me to look at it?

And does anyone else have any technical issues they need help with so I can avoid the fact that I have /no/ inspiration whatsoever for Jason's current contest? Yikes!

moonrat said...

i missssed you!!!! you're what's been missing from my life! i dont care how mean you are to your kids, just never abandon us again!

nice new blog, btw :)

preTzel said...

Yes, blogger does not allow you to just move your links over. That is one thing that aggravates the heck out of me.

Love the new blog and will change the address on my link bar so others that wish to see you can find you here. :) Welcome back Ello!

Don't worry about being a "stinker" mom. I am too. ;)

Rena said...

LOL @ the cookie story. Sounds like something I'd do and then feel like a heel if I discovered there weren't anymore left to replace them with. Your daughter might like this --

http://analyzer.depaul.edu/paperplate/Oreo%20Moon%20Phases.htm

I think the original project used regular sized Oreos, but this one uses the mini ones. :)

Michelle H. said...

I'm a follower. I'm going to change the link at my place now. Love the new place. I hope it works out for you.

Melissa Marsh said...

You've trained her well! Hahahaha...great story.

Merry Monteleone said...

There you are!!! I missed you, Ello!!! Linky love will be redirected shortly.

My littlest guy has a thing with germs. If I want to annoy him, I take a bite of his cookie or a sip from his chocolate milk. He won't touch it after it has your germs on it and he gets fairly indignant about it.

He tried, one time, to use my trick. He took a bite of his older brother's fresh baked chocolate chip cookie... Oldest glared at him, and then stuffed the rest of the cookie in his mouth anyway to make sure littlest guy didn't steal the rest.

"Hey! That had my germs on it!" littlest guy shouted, "You can't eat it now."

Older guy swallowed down the overlarge bite and said, "It was just spit. I don't care about spit. If it had boogers on it I wouldn't eat it... but neither would you."

Poor kid, it'll take him awhile to outsmart older brother where chocolate chip cookies are concerned.

Whirlochre said...

Wow. That was like one of those moments in a World Frozen Over With Wafer Thin Ice scenario where you're straddling a sub-zero body of water and a huge shark surfaces in front of you and says "jump this way" so you jump and everything is OK and you realise it wasn't a shark after all but a friendly otter.

cindy said...

yay! congrats on the new abode. and how wonderful of aerin to help! she looks exactly like that foto too--well just as hot, at least. =D

Charles Gramlich said...

hum, so why did you change blogs?

Christina Farley said...

Smart move to change your blog to your name. I'll relink you so I'll get your posts.

Your such a good mom! Playdates!

Kim Kasch said...

I'm so old...when my kids were little there was no such thing as playdates - at least that's what I tell them, now.

And I used to tell them on November 1st when they found the best candies missing from their bins - I had to test it. They'd ask, "But did you have to test all of it?"

"I had to be sure you were safe even if I was risking my own life."

I was such a Mommy (Dearest)!

Mary Witzl said...

Happy New Year, Ello!

I'm a mean mommy too -- I've done stuff like this with pride to my kids. Some day I know they'll thank me, by returning the favor.

Cheryl Kauffman said...

Great story and Happy New Year! My daughter Beth received the book Savvy for Christmas from her grandfather. She is very excited about reading it.

Jennifer said...

Yay Ello! I just started reading your blog before you went away.

It's so nice to hear someone speak the truth about playdates! In my town it is total shame to not love them!!!

Akasha Savage said...

Yay!! I'm here!
:D

McKoala said...

Ello Ello!

I had the same linky love problem a while ago, but I was a lazy thing and didn't put the list back up! I just followed everyone and will add your new blog to my following list now.

Happy New Year! May you be blessed with many Oreos!

Demon Hunter said...

Sounds like a funny mommy to me. That's hilarious. You have to have fun with your kids. No one wants a boring mommy. :-D

I've been really busy, but had to stop by the new blog and say hello. I'll be linking this blog and the old one just in case I need to go back for a laugh. :-)

Yeah, I'm missing from your sidebar, so feel free to add me back. I have to follow this one. I'll be in and out of the blogosphere pretty much until after the honeymoon. :-)

jason evans said...

Great looking new digs Ello! Best of luck with the new launch and with marketing your book. :)

And thanks for the contest mention!

RiverSoul said...

Oh, a naughty plan you drew!
But your kid got the better of you,
So nxt time, beware of the cue,
Your kid is just as naughty too!
;)
:)
Loved this post
:)

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