I finally caved to all of Oldest's pitiful pleading and allowed her to watch Twilight the movie. The caveat was she had to watch it with me. So I have to admit to finding the movie cheesy and entertaining all at the same time. I think it will be less painful than I thought to watch the next in the series. But there were several points in the plot that I could see Oldest getting squirmy.
Me: What's the matter?
Oldest: It's so much creepier to see it.
Me: See what?
Oldest: He's watching her as she sleeps and she doesn't even know it. That's so creepy. Plus he's wearing pink lipstick.
Me: Yeah, how embarrassing - especially the lipstick part. In fact, I think I have that exact lipstick shade. How embarrassing for me!
Oldest: I would hate having someone staring at me while I sleep. It's too weird and creey.
Me: Not to mention uncomfortable. What if you snore or fart in your sleep?
Oldest: Or pick your nose or scratch your butt or drool all over your pillow, like Angus.
(both of us begin to giggle madly before we are silent again.)
Oldest: Hey Mom, can you do me a favor?
Oldest: Can you promise to never talk like this in front of my friends, ever?
Me: Oh no, are you saying I embarrass you now?
Oldest: Yes, but don't worry, you're not alone, all parents are embarrassing.
Me: I'm hurt.
Oldest: Get over it, you're a grown up.
Me: (sigh) And clearly so are you.