Friday, May 15, 2009

Worst Mom Ever

Copyright MMMichelle courtesy of Creative Comons License

I'm feeling a bit like this duck here. I am feeling like a bad mom and I admit to being a bit mortified. Two Saturdays ago Oldest had a bad fall at her soccer game. Da Man who is also the head coach of her team, called me to let me know that he was sending Oldest home with another Mom while he finished out the game. I was at the elementary school's spring fling with Angus and Youngest and I rushed home to meet Oldest. When she arrived home, we iced up her arm and I had her lie down. However, Oldest desperately wanted to go back to spring fling because she had bought 25 raffle tickets that she put into one basket. She assured me that she was ok to go back and so we all returned to school where upon Oldest watched as her best friend won the basket she wanted. Apparently her best friend put 60 raffle tickets in the basket. I put down Oldest's pained smile of congratulations to disappointment rather than her injury.

We returned home and Da Man and I debated whether or not we needed to take Oldest to the doctor. Her arm was showing no sign of bruising or swelling so we decided to wait. Fast forward to this past Wednesday. Oldest has continued to complain about pain so we took her to see the orthopedist who takes an X-ray and informs us that Oldest has a broken arm. Thankfully it was a clean break and it had already begun to heal. But that doesn't stop us from feeling pretty terrible.

Thank goodness Oldest is a nice kid, cause if it had been Angus or Youngest, they would be guilting us into buying a puppy, a kitten, the entire inventory of Toys R us, etc. The only thing Oldest asked for was a lollipop and a hug. She's a nice kid, doesn't know a thing about extortion. Which of course makes me feel worse.

The only thing that makes me feel better is that the doctor told us that there is nothing you can really do for a break like that (upper arm) but to put it in a sling and rest it, which we have been doing.

So tonight as I put the girls to sleep, Youngest pointed to her finger and told me that she was pretty sure she had broken it. I told her that there isn't much I could do for a broken finger but kiss it. As I went to kiss it she loudly shrieked "Ow! Kisses don't make it feel better!" When I asked her what would, she immediately pronounced "a new American Girl doll would make it feel much better Mommy. Especially the one called Ivy." Yeah, a $90 doll for a busted finger? I don't think so. Oldest's broken arm only cost me a $3.00 lollipop, although I would have driven to NY to buy her an American Girl doll if she had only asked. Which is why, I'm so glad Oldest is not an extortionist like her younger sisters. For the record, my mother-in-law has given verbal evidence on the fact that Da Man was a con artist from a young age so I blame his genes for their deviousness.

Poor Oldest. Not only does she have rotten parents that let a broken arm go undiagnosed for nearly 2 weeks, but she isn't devious enough to milk it for all that it's worth. I'm feeling so bad about this, I think I need a spa day. I think I have to guilt Da Man into paying for it - after all he was coaching when Oldest got hurt...

31 comments:

Aniquez de los mil luces said...

Aww... don't be too hard on yourself. Its not like you are Wonder-woman that you had X-ray vision and could see the arm was broken? Hmm... Wonder Woman didn't have X-ray vision either did she? Superman of course did. So lets call you Super-woman then and just settle it.

Again if you rushed to the doctor every time your darlings had a fall, you'll be best friends with the doctor in no time. So take your spa and let this one slip.

Oldest is a really nice kid. I used to guilt my dad to buying me a G.I. Joe action figure or a Hot Wheels car every time I fell ill. :D :D

Oh, yes G.I. Joe movie is coming up soon. Sienna Miller is looking HOTT as Baroness.


And almost for got... who the hell took that photograph? Its not so much bad parenting as bad photography! He could have saved those poor little things instead of taking pictures.

But then again, its a few little quaking things vs some good laughs... hmm... lemme think... umm what the hell... let them fall in the gutter. Its not that they are famous as Ugly Betty... or Duckling.:D

JaneyV said...

I injured my own child's arm swinging him around. (I may have even dislocated it - I massaged it back in place). It happens more often than you think. A clean break wouldn't have any other symptoms than discomfort. There are lots of breaks that don't require plaster - ribs, collar bone, coccyx, clean long bone fractures - don't sweat it. We had a kid fall over in school. He seemed a bit upset but didn't cry much and he had full movement so we just called his parents who also did nothing. They eventually brought him to hospital the next day for an x-ray. It was broken too. And both his parents were doctors.

LOL at Aniket. Wouldn't it good to be Superwoman?
My mother would never be manipulated into buying me toys no matter what, so I'm more like Oldest. Although she did buy me chocolate and a colouring book when I had to have my lip stitched after my sister pulled a stool I was standing on out from underneath me, causing me to knock a tooth out which went through my lip. I often think I got those treats to teach my sister a lesson because my mother expressly told me I wasn't to share them.

McKoala said...

Oh, oh! But you are not the first parent to do this! Clearly Oldest is far too brave. She needs to master the art of The Whinge.

Whirlochre said...

It's taken me half an hour to read this post. I'm so cut up about those little ducklings, I can't see for tears.

Meanwhile, hope Oldest is OK.

If it's any consolation, I once took Son of Whirl out in his buggy at 8 months in the searing August heat with nothing to protect him from the sun — and no liquid. We were out for three whole hours and he didn't die. It was only when we stopped by a farm to pet a fluffy pony that I realised something was wrong. Kids don't sponge up mucus from a pony's nostrils unless they're seriously dehydrated.

Aerin said...

Whatever I was going to say got lost in Whirl's snot anecdote.

Cheryl Kauffman said...

Don't feel bad. A friend of mine fell and didn't get diagnosed with a broken arm for 2 weeks also. She said she wasn't in that much pain and only went to the doctor because it had been so long. She also just had to wear a sling.

Kate said...

Awww, it coudn't have been too bad because your oldest would have said something before two weeks. Your Oldest sounds so sweet, not using extortion. It's a natural skill for children, if you don't feel guilty using it.

writtenwyrdd said...

I know you are going to continue feeling bad about this incident, as well as guilty, mortified and whatever -ied word could possibly apply. But this was a non-displaced fracture, aka a crack, and I had one that even the doctors missed when I was a kid. It happens. It wasn't your fault. The arm wasn't bent at a funny angle or swollen.

I'm glad the kiddo is okay, however.

Patti said...

this is actually a pretty common experience. no outward signs of breakage , no swelling, no bruising. you kept an eye on it and then did what was necessary. you did just fine. but hey, if you're still feeling guilty you could get me a puppy...

Vivian said...

Oldest is Brave, with a capital B. Plus her pain threshold must be HUGE--no wonder you didn't know. My middle one broke her arm a couple years ago, falling off the monkey bars. I didn't think anything of it, the fall didn't look bad. Except she kept crying and moaning how much it hurt. Plus she cradled her arm, which I understand is a sign doctors look for in breaks. Middle One has a high pain threshold, she rarely cries or complains about pain, so I knew to take her right away to the doctor. If she didn't do that, I would've just iced it and had her take it easy.

I hope Oldest feels better and learns a little bribery from Youngest. Such things can be absorbed with a little practice. In the meantime, take it easy. You deserve it with all the emotional trauma.

Aerin said...

Ell, check this out:

http://www.truuconfessions.com/channels/Mom

-Aer

Aniquez de los mil luces said...

LOL on Aerin's link. That's surely a great place for Moms. :D

And while we are at it.. this is completely unrelated to the post but surely something you might like:

http://xkcd.com/584/

cindy said...

awww, totally not your fault. there's so much going on in your life, wow. how do you manage ello? you are my heroine! *hugs*

Charles Gramlich said...

With a slight break like that there's no way to tell. Except when it continues to hurt. I'm glad everything got taken care of.

laughingwolf said...

lol... NOW who's being an extortionist? :O

but, sure... HE shoulda known better ;)

Lauren said...

The poor little ducks! I teared up when looking at it and feel angry towards whoever took the pictures. Why couldn't they shoo the duck away :(

You are not like that duck at all. Kids fall and usually it's nothing. Neither of you realized that there was an issue at the time. There's no way you could have known that there was. If you rushed her to the doctor every time she had a similar bump the doctor would hate you and not look at your kids anymore...lol. But seriously, you can have the same fall a thousand times and just sometimes for some reason you get a little fracture. It's so common to not even realize and have it heal on it's own.

Robin said...

Flipped through these posts so I wouldn't be redundant! So here goes: women (girls) have a high tolerance for pain so I'm sure it was a Jones-type-fracture....you're an amazing Mom...absolutely an amazing Mom..wasn't on a growth plate..you're child was lying there in a fever in extreme pain..you didn't ignore her pleas for help and go to the bar for some belly shots and a game of pool.....see how good I am at taking the angst of your very good, above average parenting?

Robin said...

Oh gosh! IF you're child was...lying there, in pain....!

Mary Witzl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mary Witzl said...

Hahaha -- you go for that spa day, Ello!

My best friend broke her arm when she was a little kid. Her mother was the World's Greatest Mother, but she didn't realize her arm was broken for a few days.

I agree with Aniquez about the duck photo. I'm hoping that right after he took this photo the photographer pried the grid off, lowered himself into the sewer and saved those ducklings. He'd better have.

C.R. Evers said...

(((hugs))) Don't beat yourself up, hon. I hear so many stories of kids breaking bones and the parents not realizing it until later.

I don't have a broken bone story, but my middle daughter had an ear infection, and it got pretty bad, but I didn't know it because she never complained of her ear hurting. i felt bad about it, but then I realized that just because we're moms doesn't mean we have x-ray vision to detect what would couldn't possibly know.

You didn't do anything wrong.

more (((hugs)))

Martha Flynn said...

Duuuude - my parents ignored my brother's post-wrestling-match complaints of pain for days until that kid was throwing up blood. And even then, there was a few minutes of, "Well...maybe it will go away?"

Best wishes to Oldest!! That she get better AND learn to milk mommy's guilt just a wee bit.

Kim Kasch said...

OMG another blast from my past. I had the same kind of thing happen when my kids were young. Jake fell out of bed and kept complaining. We let it go. The next day we took him to the doctor - a broken collar bone.

Luckily he's my oldest and no extortionist ;-)that title would go to youngest. They learn from the elders

Lana Gramlich said...

I hope Oldest feels better soon.

Absolute Vanilla (and Atyllah) said...

Right, see, now this is why I'm glad I don't have children - first, I can't injure it, which I'm sure I would inadvertantly do, secondly, I can't get guilted and thirdly, I can't get manipulated. Whew! I don't envy you! ;-)
Poor Oldest - I hope the arm mends cleanly and quickly.

Akasha Savage said...

Firstly...the photos of the mother duck and ducklings is funny but sad all at the same time!!

Secondly...when I was thirteen I fell off my pony (named Nobby!) and landed heavily on my right arm. I was miles from home, so pulled myself back into the saddle, rode home, untacked Nobby, put him back in his field, carried my saddle and stuff home, walked in the front door...and promptly fainted!
One hospital visit and an x-ray later revealed I had cracked my elbow!
Love to your Oldest, hope she feels better soon.

Ello said...

Thank you everyone. I am definitely starting to feel better now. And you guys all helped!

And the picture is funny and sad and I'm sure that whoever took it did turn around and call the animal humane society to save the ducklings. Those poor ducklings...

edawn said...

Clicked over here from BB.

Don't feel so bad. One of the boys on my son's soccer team went to several practices with a "sore" foot before they figured out it was broken.

March to the Sea said...

uggh..sorry to hear oldest got hurt. Its hard though..they can act like the word is coming to an end when they get a splinter..but a broken bone will just get you some "it kinda hurts a little" so its hard to decide an ER visit or not sometimes! Glad oldest is on the mend!

moonrat said...

I'm sorry that I laughed my butt off at this post. Your Oldest sounds like she is very warm-hearted and will probably forgive me.

Stuart Neville said...

Late to this, but it reminded me of something that happened to my niece when she was very young...

She has a habit of always claiming the slightest ache or injury was a broken bone. Is she stubbed a toe, it was broken. If she bumped her head, it was broken. If she got a sore butt from sitting too long, it was broken. Then one day she fell whilst climbing on the garden gate. It took a lot of whinging before anyone took her seriously, and then, lo and behold, a broken harm. Crying wolf and all that...

Hope oldest is feeling better. :)

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